Behind The Scenes: The Martin St. Louis/Ryan Callahan Trade

Behind The Scenes is where I bring you into the room where the trade was being discussed. Of course none of this is real, but it's a good way to lighten the mood and have a laugh at Glen Sather.

Enter New York, Glen Sather's office, where he is meeting with Tampa Bay Lightning GM Steve Yzerman.

Glen Sather: Hey Stevie! Welcome to the Rangers! We're happy to have you here, is there a specific number you'd like to wear?

Steve Yzerman: Glen, you know I'm not playing for the Rangers, right? Wouldn't you know if you signed me? I'm a General Manager now.

GS: Yes, of course! Of course you are. I was just "joshing" as the hip youngsters like to call it. Anyway, I'm assuming you're here to ask about Stu Bickel? To be honest, Steve, we forgot he existed too until his parents called to ask about him. You can have him if you want, we'll even throw in a signed Rick Nash jersey Bickel likes to wear.

SY: No, no. I don't even know who Stu Bickel is, and that's a ridiculous name. Where do you find these people, Glen?

GS: Stu Bickel's Father is a fellow cigar club member. He gave me two cigars to let Bickel play for the Rangers. Anway, what are you actually here for, then?


SY: I'm here to discuss the possibility of you guys trading for Martin St. Louis, remember?

GS: I thought you said you're from Tampa Bay? Now you're trading me players from St. Louis? What is this? Are we doing a three team deal without someone's permission? The last time I made a trade without informing the other team was the Ryan McDonagh trade, so why not? I'll take Stamkos and Backes.

SY: No Glen, we want to trade you Martin St. Louis from our team, the Lightning. We would like Chris Kreider and Ryan McDonagh in return.

GS: Steve, I may be old. I may not know what "hybrid" icing is. But if there's one thing I do know it's that Ryan McDonagh and Chris Kreider are not going to be traded! We can offer you Daniel Carcillo and a Knick, Dolan never has any clue what's going on anyway.

SY: C'mon Glen, we both know how bad the Knicks are. How about Ryan Callahan and Marc Staal?

GS: No can do. Callahan is the heart and soul of this storied franchise, and Marc Staal is a great defenseman.

SY: What if instead of Staal you included draft picks?

GS: You.....you want our draft picks? Why didn't you say so! How many would you like?

SY: Uh, I don't know. Two? A first and a second sounds fair.

GS: So two draft picks and Callahan? OK, I can work with that. Who needs heart and soul, this isn't a movie. I would have given you all of our draft picks if you asked!

SY: Is it too late for that?

*Glen Sather is now asleep. End scene.